Noah's room is ready and waiting!

For those who don't know, I want to name my adopted son Noah Franklyn Osborne. I will keep his given birth name as a second middle name for his birth certificate, adoption certificate and other important documents. But for most purposes he will go by Noah Franklyn Osborne.

The name Noah is taken from the book/movie "The Notebook." The lead character, Noah, has always reminded me of how powerful love can be. The name Franklyn comes from two people. Frank is a dear friend who, against all odds, survived a coma and life support and is one of the kindest men I know. I've decided to use the alternative spelling to Franklin and go with Franklyn. My sister, Anna Lynn, was killed by a drunk driver. This way I will also honor my sister. I also connect with the unusual "y" because I have one in my name ... Jayne. The whole name just gives me a feeling of completeness ... it encompasses powerful love, courage and strength, and a way for my sister's name and memory to live on. Keeping his given name is my way of showing respect for his history and his country of birth.

The baby's room is finished. The theme of the room is Noah's Ark! Really original, huh? (smile) Here is a photo of most of the room along with a picture of an adorable Noah's Ark Rocking Chair given to me by my friend, Paula Smith.

I have to believe this adoption WILL happen. I have to have FAITH that God will see it through. So ... I'm taking those steps of faith ... one of them ... having Noah's room ready and waiting!! I can't wait to show him the place!!

Everything step feels HUGE!!

Could I possibly be in Kazakhstan in ONE month? I've always said I work better under pressure and I feel each passing day is so very important. I try to get two or three things done each day in my preparations for travel.

I don't know why ... but every little step seems like a HUGE step to me. There are so many important details to consider. Packing for 6 weeks for me and the baby in just two suitcases is enough to give me a breakdown! Is my mass of required paperwork current and perfect ... because Lord knows ... every i must be dotted and every t must be crossed or is it i's crossed and t's dotted? I've done so much paperwork over the last two years that at this point, it's hard to tell! I think it must be BOTH! Ha!

Today, I went to an International Travel Clinic and got my Hepatitus A and Hepatitus B, tetanus, and typhoid shots. They also were kind enough to supply me with Cipro to battle traveler's diarrhea. I was "schooled" about health risks. DON'T DRINK THE WATER! Don't even brush your teeth with it. Don't open your mouth in the shower! I'm so paranoid now, I'll probably end up dehydrated! (smile)

My dear friend, Beth Gliatta, took me to Babies R Us and Target to do my "baby registry" this past weekend. I swear I don't know what I would have done without her ... her "Mama" expertise was invaluable! I didn't know boys and girls wore different diapers! Oh ... that's just the start of it! The whole experience made me feel quite inadequate! It was a little embarrassing ... so thank God she's a good friend!! I had no idea that picking out a stroller and car seat could be so exciting!! The experience kept me in butterflies and made me feel so much closer to being there ... Kazakhstan, that is. A baby shower is being planned by my work buddies for October 7th! I wonder if they have a clue what this means to me? Hmm ... I think they do.

One concern I'm facing is my I-171H ... all important document ... expires in mid-November. This could be mid-trip. I can't return home with the baby without a renewed one. BUT I'll be in Kazakhstan when the renewal arrives in my mailbox at home ... so it will have to be mailed overseas to me. Talk about faith.

I'm beginning to think that faith is what this is all about.

In honor of my mother ...

While I could post something about the fact that I am getting my needed immunizations for foreign travel, have started making a dent in my packing, have informed everyone and their mother about my cute little "referral," I feel led to write about something that is even more on my mind ... my mother.

When I began this "process" of adoption, the first person who joined in the excitement and gave me her full support was my mother ... and that felt so good. From the initial decision to adopt, she wanted to know every step I took and wanted to share in each and every joy. When the plans were to travel in June of '06 to Samara, Russia ... my 80 year old Mom had her bags packed way in advance. She collected gifts for the baby and for the caretakers and had them neatly packed with her summer clothes in two maroon suitcases in the spare bedroom of her house. When the trip was delayed to the fall, she took out her summer clothes and put in her fall clothes. When this adoption began to fail, she never unpacked her bags. When I went home for Christmas that year, one of the first things she wanted to talk about was what had happened with the adoption and I was so devastated that I said, "Mom ... I need you to understand that I am so fragile right now. I cannot talk about it." She nodded, looked down and said, "I understand." Given time, I worked through the emotions and started over. My Mom started over with me! I signed on with Little Miracles International on March 1st. On April 16th, I called my mother around 4:00 in the afternoon and I told her about the progress that had been made in the adoption and she said ... "Just give me the word ... my bags are packed." That very evening, my Mom had a massive heart attack. Although she survived the attack, she never left the hospital and passed away exactly 3 weeks later of acute respiratory distress sydrome.

I bought a beautiful large gold cross necklace to give her in the hospital ... but the nurses said she couldn't wear jewelry ... so I kept waiting until they said okay. I still have it. During one night that I spent with her in the hospital ... I was leaning over her watching her sleep. She opened her eyes, looked right into mine, smiled, and said, "I see an angel." I'll never, ever forget how that made me feel.

This summer, I had "I see an angel" engraved on the back of the gold cross and I've planned to begin wearing it ... but I haven't been able to decide on a day and time to give the moment I put it on ... justice. Until now ...

I've decided to put it on for the first time ... the day I leave for Kazakhstan. It will be my way of taking my Mom with me ... a physical reminder of something I already know in my soul ... that she is STILL with me and will share in my joy when I take this beautiful baby boy in my arms, look into his eyes and say, "I see an angel."

News for a New Post!

I finally have news to share!

My dossier was "stuck" in Almaty, Kazakhstan at the Ministry for quite a while. It seems the Minister went on a lengthy vacation and didn't return until July 17th. Even then, my dossier stayed "stuck" there as ... from my understanding ... the ministers in the regions were taking vacations. My case manager said she has never seen Kazakhstan move so slowly. But I always got the impression that things would start moving soon. There was a part of me that couldn't help but be afraid. I believe fears develop from past experiences ... and so it is probably understandable that as I move closer toward traveling, I am afraid that what happened before will happen again.

Meanwhile, my agency asked me to take part in a conference call about "Traveling Blind vs. Traveling with a Referral." I had already decided to travel blind and the call helped me understand everything to expect once I arrived.

It was after this call that a part of me was wondering if I should consider asking for a referral. For those who don't know, this is when the agency presents an available child to me. I could then travel specifically to see that particular child.

One day, I spoke with my case manager and she enlightened me as to the current situation she was seeing in Kaz. She said that LMI expected to get some referrals in around the end of August ... 1st of September as quite a few children were coming off the registry. (Children must stay on the "registry" for 6 months before they are available for adoption.) She herself was thinking that a referral might come sooner than my dossier would make it to a particular region. We discussed whether I would be open to receiving a referral. I reminded her of my 1st experience having had a referral (the 10 month old girl from Samara, Russia) and how it broke my heart. We talked and talked and I decided to be open to either. This discussion occurred around mid August.

Well ... on Wed., August 29th ... I was in my classroom teaching and I noticed on my cell phone that I had a message from a "NO NUMBER." That is usually always my case manager. I felt butterflies and a little weak as I could think of no reason she would be calling me on that day unless she had some sort of news. The first moment I had, I walked outside the school where I could get reception. When she answered, she said she had two possible scenarios for me. The first was that my dossier could be sent to the Almaty region ... an orphanage 1 1/2 hours outside the big city of Almaty. I would travel blind. Two trips would be required. She had a second scenario ... she told me there was an adorable Kazakh baby boy, 8 months old ... in the Semey region ... available for adoption. She said he was a preemie but otherwise healthy. She said the Semey is a region that has been waiving the appeals period and that the last two families that traveled there were able to have their baby immediately after court and complete the entire trip in a total time of 5 1/2 weeks. I asked her to send me his photos and medical information. I was on the phone with my case manager as I pulled up the photos and I exclaimed, "Oh my goodness ... he's adorable!!!!!" Three photos appeared ... one where he looked sad, one complacent, and one where he was giggling. Soooooooooooooo cute! I was melting!! We agreed that I would check with my International Adoption Doctor first in reference to the child's medical and then I would make a decision. (In my heart, I already had made a decision but I had to think with my head and not my heart.)

On Friday, my IA doctor called me and told me the wonderful news!!! She saw absolutely no problems whatsoever that concerned her. We spoke briefly and I hung up the phone and felt so full of joy!!!! I called my case manager to tell her the great news. After a round of phone tag, we connected and she said she would let LMI know that we had a "Baby Osborne." Hearing that made me feel amazing inside!!! LMI is going to send me a contract and I should get it next week. Meanwhile, my dossier will be sent to Semey, Kazakhstan where it will be processed. Now ... I will be awaiting my LOI (Letter of Invitation) from Semey. My case manager ... that I will from here on out call AJ ... said I will probably travel in late October.

I wish I could post the baby's pictures but you just never know what will happen ... and I want to make sure everything is going to work out before I do so. But just trust me that he is as adorable as they come!!